key words: self-care, self-reflection, mindfulness, poetry, qi gong / nei gong, tai chi, finding your current calling, clearing physical clutter and Marie Kondo's books, journaling with James Pennabaker's books or journal prompts from Wayne Jonas, MD and the Samueli Institute, and a couple self-reflection prayerwork traditions
Self-Care: Practicing Self-reflection
Background
If you could use an opportunity to renew your self-care,
whether it is your new year resolution or just the spring-cleaning vibe, the
Lenten season is as good a time as any.
Lent is 40 days before Easter from Ash Wednesday to Good Friday. It coincides with the turning of the season
from late winter to spring.
The Christian observance of Lent focuses on
self-reflection and discerning your path to your best self—to discerning your
path/your calling. It is about clearing out the (internal) debris and clutter between you
and God and turning your path back toward the Light.
You don’t have to be Christian for these timeless ideas
to sound familiar.
So, in your self-care practice, pick what is true to you
and your path. This blogpost is only my
ideas from my limited experience.
If some of this is helpful, great!
If it’s not for you, that is okay; just let it go.
Where Self-Reflection Fits Into Self-Care Habits
So, in self-care practice, you should have some element
of self-reflection.
I discussed this
briefly in an
earlier blogpost about different categories of self-care to include movement, self-reflection/mindset/inspiration, nutrition/food,
spending time outdoors, breathwork, and recreation/socializing and connecting
to your community.
How to Start Your Self-Reflection Habit
As we move from winter to spring, take quiet time to be
with your heart. Quiet, heart-listening
time.
What comes up for you?
Peace or restlessness?
If it is restlessness or discontent, can you identify
where this is coming from?
The energy of spring is about forward movement and new
growth.
Is there a change you need to make in your life? In self-reflection, slowly work to discern,
what this discontent or restlessness is connected to.
Is this leading you forward on your life path toward the
best-version-of-yourself? Or is
something in your current life or your lifestyle that has you stuck in a rut or
leading you to something you do not want to be?
What do you need to do to be closer to the
best-version-of-yourself? Journal about
it. Find mentors who can help you on
your path. Keep working on it. 5 minutes/day minimum is better than no time
at all.
Identify (to yourself) the clutter you are clearing out
to make space and peace in your heart and in your life.
There are so many ways this can manifest, as many ways as
there are individuals. And, as an
individual, you may find one pattern of clearing/de-cluttering/cleaning that
works best for you. And you may notice
you have familiar ruts you get stuck in.
You may need to change up how you do your
clearing/de-cluttering/cleaning when you “best way” is no longer working as
well as it used to.
Change is uncomfortable.
And, change is constant.
“Often when you’re
at the edge of something, you’re at the beginning of something else.” -Fred
Rogers
“Nobody else can
live the life you live. And even though
no human being is perfect, we always have the chance to bring what’s unique
about us to live in a redeeming way.” -Fred Rogers
“Our lives change
when our habits change.” –Matthew Kelly
Self-reflection—discerning
your current calling
Sister Joan Chittister, in her book
Following the Path: the search for a life of passion, purpose, and joy, says an individual rarely has just one calling in
life. In fact, we are called to
different things throughout our lives.
But we must practice self-reflection and discernment to hear those calls
and recognize what they are. And, have
the courage to follow them. Saint Mother
Teresa of Calcutta had a calling-within-a-calling.
Steven Pressfield and Tim Grahl talk about “shadow
careers”.
That we are following what we feel is “best fit” and “right at the time”
careers that help us develop the skills we need for our “true calling”. But that everything eventually becomes a
shadow of what your next calling is.
Links to Stephen Pressfield’s books:
Concluding Message
We should be always listening to our
hearts, discerning in our self-reflection practices, and taking stock of where
we are in our path toward what we are called to be, the
best-version-of-ourselves, and what that looks like, in that time and space.
Ideas
and resources
If you are looking for ideas to renew
or start your self-reflection practice, here are some resources to learn more
about mindfulness, clearing physical clutter, journaling, tai chi and qi gong,
prayerwork, and poetry.
Mindfulness
Related
blogposts and websites
Clearing
the Physical Clutter
Journaling
Journaling, proven by James
Pennebaker and colleagues (published in peer-reviewed scientific journals) to
be useful in processing emotions and ideas in a healthy way. Journaling helps process experiences to find
clarity. Journaling has proven health
benefits.
- For more about the research
and health benefits of journaling:
- For practice exercises on how to
journal in this way, the following books are noted as more useful:
- Dr. Wayne Jonas on journaling
Tai
Chi and Qi Gong
Prayer
work
- Work with a spiritual director in
your faith. The oldest Christian
monastic order, the Benedictines, have a tradition of outreach to community in
spiritual direction from one-on-one sessions, group sessions, and retreats that
are non-denominational or Catholic.
- For example, see the St. Placid
Priority programs in Olympia, WA, at the Priory Spirituality Center 2019 programs include art (felting,
enneagram), music-facilitated imagery for the soul, and seasonal programs (Lenten
retreat).
- Or maybe other monastic traditions in
your area may offer some form of spiritual direction.
- If you enjoy mindfulness practices
and quiet contemplation, you may be interested in learning centering
prayer. The old tradition of lectio divina that leads to the practice
of centering prayer is both peaceful and healing but requires a mentor due to its complexity and depths.
- Centering prayer books: Thomas Keating, founder of the modern centering prayer practice
Poetry
and Poetry-Prose
 |
Tao De Ching
(on the Reflective Reads post) |
- Ideas for inspiration at the Reflective Reads blogpost include the
following authors: John Muir, Lao-Tzu,
Mary Oliver, Benjamin Franklin, William Butler Yeats, and John O’Donohue
 |
| poetry is a useful vehicle for self-reflection |